All I Have Left Is Hate

All I Have Left Is Hate

Man, love was so delicious,

I ate it for dinner last night,

Now all there is left is emptiness,

Until what comes to be exposed is something utterly vicious.

There is a fire that the infernal Hell could not contain,

A fire so intense it could melt the sun,

A fire so constant, so instable,

That the element called time could not preserve anyone.

Indelible wolves consume my soul,

The impertinence of lightning takes my heart

Death encroaches on my face,

Violence cascades over my art.

To someone who had everything,

Anger remains a hindrance,

But to a nobody who has nothing,

Anger is where there dwells a compliance.

To the one with a special connection to this world,

Let there dwell the heart,

To the one with no acceptance in the world,

Let there dwell the fire of the hearth.

Because to be all alone, truly lone,

To the mercy of the cold wind that claims your innocence,

To be at the mercy of the afflictions that rise from within the earth,

To be pillaged by rot by those without penance,

To be an onus of everything you see,

To always be in the way,

To feel inadequate,

Beauty, what's that, where once did that dwell in my plea?

To be without that light that everyone else has or at least had once in the past,

To never really feel appreciated or loved by this hateful world,

So much hate would possess your will,

Can you see it being impossible to be different?

I took my mind to a world where everyone shared camaraderie,

They asked "What is wrong with your world?"

I said "Too much hate to be seen"

"Life is really what had been that depraved?"

"Indeed, hate, consume me"

"You know all I can bring to your heart is pain"

"Yes, but that of loneliness is but an even worse evil,

What shall I do about my emotional suffering"

"Ha… suffering, there is no such thing"

"How can you say that"

"When one shuts out all those foolish emotions that can feel that about any one of those things,

I have no patience for love and pain, but loneliness is useful".

Ah yes, I am the lone wolf,

The traveling sparrow,

The hibernating, lonely bear,

All alone and dormant within darkness.

I am the tunnel below the ground,

The trudge of the water in the sewage,

The muffled screams of the homeless that inhabit them,

Where simply no one could hear their cries.

I want to be the ghost,

One that watches, but cannot be watched,

One that listens, but cannot be listened to,

One that can see, but cannot be seen.

I want you to leave,

Loneliness wants you to go,

We are a couple,

So we can't have you interfere,

Loneliness has given me this blank white wife,

Loneliness has given me my imagination and my animated life,

Loneliness has given me my creative video games,

Loneliness has given me this anger support,

So begone, with your gifts of false pretense,

Begone with your foolish façade and charades,

Begone you foolish human race,

Go ahead and forlorn me like you had conspired to do from the beginning.

All I ask is that you do not treat me the fickle way you are to so many,

I am not fickle, never have been,

So pick up your egotistical selfishness,

And leave the depression of existence.

There is only one that desires the hate,

Only one that takes it up with the depression,

As though a sponge works diligently,

To soak up the soiled bath water of the defiant, who remain clean.

Yes humanity, curse me,

Existence, do not give me a companion,

Lord, I am not worthy of your efforts,

Because when the planet Earth had given Love to everyone it could,

It gave all of their hate to me.